Thus my life has taken a turn for the better. That is not to say that it was bad, it was just stuck.
Nothing was happening, i was content enough to work, but there wasnt anymore than that.
I have been a lot more active and happier for it, however; something in me still feels empty, it is a void i have not been able to feel, and after much thought i think that in this i have truly just given up, at least i have a strong desire to leave that behind me and try to focus all my energies in what i do.
I do feel far removed to really understanding myself and much more closer to just accepting what happens and hope that i have a reason to the madness, that ultimately there is a logic to it all in the end.